Stop doing your online banking at stop lights

As a self-confessed, (albeit, mild mannered) road rager, this will likely be the first of many vents from my observations behind the wheel.

What do people do at red lights?

Did they just discover that Facebook went public and are feverishly moving stocks via mobile phones to make room in their portfolio for a few shares? Have they picked this moment to declutter their purse?

All I know is that once the light turns red, it shouldn't take more than two or three seconds to transfer your foot from the brake to the gas and move on through to the other side. But does this always happen? No. More often than not, I find myself waiting a good 10 seconds or more for the car in front of me to move.

Now, I know 10 seconds doesn't sound like a long time to wait in the grand scheme of things, but in the grand scheme of things it is a long time!

It's like some drivers put their vehicles in park during a red light, or suddenly forget where first gear is when the light turns green.

And don't even get me started if we're talking about a left turn flashing advance green light. It is the job of the lead car to get as many people through that light as possible. That's the only way the whole team wins. Be a good captain people – don't leave any soldiers behind! It is totally unforgivable when only the lead car gets through.

Unforgivable.

While I do find this frustrating, I have yet to be pushed over the edge enough to honk my horn. I did have an interesting dilemma on one occasion however, when I was travelling behind what appeared to be two Hells Angels motorcyclists.

It was a bit disconcerting to discover they were following the same route home as I, but I was even more perturbed to find myself waiting for them to get their bikes moving at each traffic stop. The third time l waited behind them at the red light, I pondered to myself: "Hmmmm. Would they think it was really ballsy of me to honk my horn at two Hells Angels to get them moving, and give me props or would they get off their bikes and pound the crap out of me?"

I didn't think it prudent to test my hypothesis but it did make me chuckle the rest of the way home. And I was more than relieved when they blew past my turn taking them (hopefully) miles away from my neighbourhood.